King Kaufman's Sports Daily

More Red Sox junk buried?

MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann reported on his “Countdown” show Monday night that the construction worker who buried the David Ortiz jersey in the new Yankee Stadium has been “shooting his bazoo off” about other Boston Red Sox items he buried “somewhere in 60,000 cubic yards of Yankee Stadium cement” in his brief time on the job site.

Curses can’t be invented. They can only be credited in retrospect

The Yankees spent the better part of a day and about $50,000 excavating the Ortiz jersey last month. It was then auctioned for charity. The team made noises about legal action, but prosecutors declined to prosecute and the matter was dropped.

Maybe the worker, Gino Castignoli, should think about burying his bazoo. Dropped matters can be picked up again.

Olbermann reports that Castignoli has bragged about burying a scorecard from the 2004 American League Championship Series, which the Red Sox won in seven games after the Yankees took a 3-0 lead. He said his sources were friends of the construction worker, who he said isn’t telling where he buried the scorecard and, in some tellings, enough other items to render the jersey and scorecard “the tip of the iceberg.”

According to unnamed and imaginary sources close to the situation, the other Red Sox-related items Castignoli has buried include: Theo Epstein’s gorilla suit, Stephen King, three spare Curt Schilling bloody socks™, a death mask of Ted Williams’ middle finger and Pokey Reese.

Once again, this column’s advice to the Yankees is to save their time and money on the jackhammering and turn Castignoli’s stunt around. Here’s the press release:

Yankee Stadium has been a burial ground for the Boston Red Sox for 86 years. We’re happy to be moving to our new home in 2009, where we can start a new tradition of entombing our rivals from the north. We thank Mr. Castignoli for getting the ball rolling in our new home, but respectfully ask him and others to refrain from burying any other tangible items at the new Yankee Stadium. The interment of the hopes and dreams of Red Sox fans will be a more than appropriate housewarming gift. Thank you.

Your friends,
The New York Yankees

NFL Week 6: Playoff picks
Baseball playoffs, that is. In other words: They’re still playing football? And: What? Hockey?
ALCS: Why not the Rays?
The Red Sox have their hands full with Tampa Bay, whose 31-win improvement was no fluke.
Early MVP favorite: Luck
Some key plays in the Phillies’ Game 1 win over the Dodgers showed what a huge role chance plays in a short series.
NLCS preview: Dodgers vs. Phillies
Manny Ramirez leads a whole new L.A. against scorching Philadelphia in a series that looks remarkably even.

King Kaufman’s Sports Daily: Like talking sports to the guy on the next barstool, if the guy on the next barstool were pretty smart and not drunk. king at salon.com, Facebook.

Recent posts

ALCS: Why not the Rays?
The Red Sox have their hands full with Tampa Bay, whose 31-win improvement was no fluke.
Early MVP favorite: Luck
Some key plays in the Phillies’ Game 1 win over the Dodgers showed what a huge role chance plays in a short series.
NLCS preview: Dodgers vs. Phillies
Manny Ramirez leads a whole new L.A. against scorching Philadelphia in a series that looks remarkably even.

Previous posts

RSS Feed

Most Recent Video

Sports Daily Video image

King Kaufman’s Sports Daily

Video: Reaching for the bottom rung. A day at an open tryout for an independent pro baseball league.

Video archive

Sports Daily Newsletter

To receive the Sports Daily Newsletter, send an e-mail to kingnewsletter@salon.com

Posts by date

October 2008
SuMoTuWeThFrSa
1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031