Claudia Schiffer is my Pilot!

The supermodel's special-edition Palm PDA inspires aisles full of celebrity gadgets.

By Janelle Brown
Published August 3, 2000 6:49PM (EDT)

Palm, Inc., the pioneer and leader of handheld computing; Claudia Schiffer, model, actress and entrepreneur; and PTN Media today announced a collaboration to design and market the Palm Vx Claudia Schiffer Edition handheld computer. A prototype of the elegant, brushed metallic-aqua Claudia Schiffer Edition handheld was unveiled today at the Red Herring "Herring on Hollywood" Conference in Los Angeles.
-- Palm Inc. press release, Aug. 1, 2000

Attention Kmart Shoppers!

We'd like to direct your attention to Aisle 8, where today we are offering a special on the official Shaq Compaq!(TM). This practical little desktop computer comes complete with a lovely basketball motif appliquid on the front, a miniature hoop where the CD-ROM drive used to be and a mouse shaped exactly like a basketball. The third in Compaq's line of special-edition basketball star computer peripherals, we think the Shaq Compaq!(TM) will look great on the shelf next to your Magic Johnson Monitor and that Krazy Kareem Keyboard. Only 39 left in Aisle 8!

While you're in Aisle 8, don't forget to stop by our display of Metallica's exclusive line of private label CD burners. No computer workstation is complete without one of these glossy black peripherals, which were designed by Lars Ulrich himself. The Metallica Edition is guaranteed to help you make perfect digital copies of every song you downloaded off Napster -- and comes with a built in "loga-rhythm" that automatically charges your credit card $10 every time you burn a copy of "Enter Sandman." Buy one for all your college buddies!

Today we're also offering a two-for-one deal on the Her-Name-Is-Rio, a limited edition MP3 player designed exclusively by Simon LeBon of Duran Duran. Yes, the '80s are back and you'll be thrilled to pick up a few of these beauties, which come pre-loaded with your favorite tunes from bands like Flock of Seagulls and Siouxsie and the Banshees. Decorated with a "splatter-paint" motif, the Her-Name-Is-Rio even comes with a complimentary pair of color-coordinated leg warmers. Mr. LeBon is making an in-store appearance, and will be available to autograph your Rio in fluorescent Puff Paint.

And ... mothers! You may already have purchased one of the ultra-slim, ultra-lightweight Claudia Schiffer Palm devices for your dieting daughters; but that doesn't mean that there isn't a handheld organizer for you, too! Make your way to Aisle 4, where we are today unveiling for the first time the Roseanne Barr PDA, an amply sized digital assistant that won't ever make you feel inadequate about the width of your thighs. Thinner isn't always better: Nope, this PDA is 4 inches thick, weighs 12 pounds and comes pre-loaded with your favorite dessert recipes and directions to all the Burger Kings within a 3 mile radius. Comes in bright purple and burnt orange -- mix and match with your favorite outfits!

Enjoy, and thank you for shopping!

Janelle Brown

Janelle Brown is a contributing writer for Salon.

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