The atrocity at the White House

The first winner of our Celebrity Dreams contest recalls the bugs and the drugs and the cat in the air.

Published December 5, 2000 8:00PM (EST)

My mother was reading the paper and asked me if I had heard about the atrocity that happened at the White House. The next scene was of the previous day, when a female pop artist who had been famous in the late '70s/early '80s performed on the lawn of the White House for President Clinton and his many minions.

Her drummer, a young Chinese man wearing a hat, a hooded jacket and dirty "alternative" style clothes, slowly walked across the lawn and sat at this drum kit, looking stoned out of his mind. I was seated behind him and had a most unusual view of the whole undertaking. Before playing, he paused to eat a large portobello mushroom with a spoon, the bottom of the mushroom cap teeming with insects. The audience murmured and whispered as the bugs crawled all over the Chinese man's hands.

All the while, the Clintons' many cats walked freely about the lawn. Finally, the band began to play and my tunnel vision of the drummer (who was quite good) created an experience much like riding a children's amusement park ride. During the performance, someone in the audience grabbed a white Persian cat and threw it into the air, breaking a couple of limbs off of a tree. The cat fell to its death. Sources later reported that this one wasn't a cat of the Clintons', but rather, a stray.


By Alex R. Young

Alex R. Young lives in Chicago.

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