The Fix

Has Madonna lost her mojo? Have we had enough of O.J. and Jacko? And what is Matt Lauer going to do with a purse? Plus: Steamy sex on a London stage!

Published April 23, 2003 6:01PM (EDT)

One heretofore unnoticed tidbit about the recent controversial remarks about homosexuality by Sen. Rick Santorum, R-Pa. -- the No. 3 man in the GOP Senate leadership -- is that the AP reporter Santorum believes "misconstrued" his remarks, Lara Jakes Jordan, is the relatively new bride of Jim Jordan, the presidential campaign manager for Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass.

Madonna's latest release, "American Life" is not getting rave reviews from critics, one of whom hit below the tank top, comparing it to "the folkie psychobabble of songwriters like Jewel." Ouch. But we think the Material Girl is looking to the charts, not the critics. The recording is No. 3 on Amazon, behind two other cute gals, Norah Jones and Cher. (CNN)

In a new book "The Secret Life of Humphrey Bogart," writer Darwin Porter claims Bogey had an affair with Louella Parsons to get good press and was in a three-way with first wife Helen Menken and Tallulah Bankhead. We hope Porter doesn't run into Lauren Bacall in a dark alley. (IMDB)

Speaking of kinky sex, there's a stage show in London, "XXX," based on "Philosophy in the Bedroom" by that family fave the Marquis de Sade and featuring such wholesome themes as oral sex, bestiality and mutilation. But the city's vice squad said the show could go on, since no real sex acts are performed onstage, only simulations thereof. We assume the queen will miss this one. (Ananova)

We need to know how this can be stopped. We hear O.J. Simpson is going to star in his own reality show -- a 13-week series based on footage shot in 2001 and 2002 in Miami. Wasn't his trial reality enough for one lifetime? (TV Guide)

More things we would rather not see: the Michael Jackson special tomorrow, "Home Movies," all about the ubiquitous recluse freak. Can someone just make him go away? Please? (MSNBC)

We admit to being a fan of "Today Show" prep dude Matt Lauer and were tickled to hear that he might have been in a bidding war for one of the Audrey Hepburn estate items being auctioned at Sotheby's for charity. He had his eye on her crocodile Hermes Kelly bag, and word is he got it for a cool $25,000. We think it will complete your ensemble nicely, Matt. (Page Six)

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By Karen Croft

Karen Croft is the editor of Salon Sex.

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