The Fix

Howard Dean a metrosexual? Did the brothers Miramax say an actress was too fat to be hired? And Michael Douglas' ex knows why girls marry for money.

Published October 29, 2003 8:00AM (EST)

Howard Dean may have inadvertently created a new category of man: a square metrosexual! At a fundraising stop in Denver yesterday he declared himself a metrosexual, told a story about being called handsome by a gay man, and professed that he's for equal justice for gay and lesbian couples. Then he said, "I'm really a square ... I've heard the term [metrosexual] but I don't know what it means." It means you know about hair products but you still like sports, Howie. How cute is he? (Denver Post)

Diandra Douglas, ex-wife of Michael Douglas, pronounced the obvious the other day when she said, "In Hollywood you do see odd couples. It's not normal for a 70-year-old man to be with a 22-year-old girl ... Certain young women fall in love with the idea of having a fat bank account and a credit card and not the person. That's why they don't care about the man's age at all." And certain men fall in love with perky breasts and cute laughs and don't care about age at all either. Diandra didn't comment on her 59-year-old ex, who is married to 34-year-old Catherine Zeta-Jones. (Ananova)

According to actress Samantha Morton, Bob and Harvey Weinstein said her arms are too fat to star in "The Brothers Grimm," even though director Terry Gilliam and the other actors wanted her to join the cast. A spokesman for Miramax denies the story. The bodacious brothers are never going to go public with a comment on anyone's upper-arm fat, now are they? (MSNBC)

Now that the New York Times has a "public editor" (as they call their ombudsman), will he be able to uncover the next Jayson Blair? The man in the job, Daniel Okrent, says: "What's interesting about that is that the call that was made was not from a reader saying Jayson Blair had been fudging. It was an editor, a senior-level editorial person at the paper. Would that have gotten to an ombudsman? Naw. Would they need an ombudsman now if such a thing ever happened again? No. Believe me, if they did not appoint me or someone else to this job, and another editor sent a memo around upstairs, it would stop. You don't need me for that." When asked how far the Times is from lovability, he replied, "I don't know ... how much do you love your wife?" (N.Y. Observer)

Tom Cruise is truly a metrosexual. He's so in touch with his feminine side that he is allowing himself to be the first cover boy in sassy Marie Claire mag history. He is doing so to promote his latest film, "The Last Samurai" and has tantalized the public by talking about his ex, Nicole Kidman, saying deep, samurai things like, "Whatever happened, happened, OK? You move on." (IMDB)

Money Quotes
Deflated Puffy?: Sean "Puffy/P. Diddy" Combs on allegations that the factory in which his Sean John clothes are made is a sweatshop that mistreats workers, subjecting them to daily body searches, contaminated drinking water and 11- to 12-hour daily shifts: "I take this issue very seriously. I am determined to get to the bottom of this." (Associated Press)

Not their bag, baby: Denis Leary to the crowd at his benefit auction to raise funds for firefighters the other night when no one -- not one person -- bid on a chance to have tea in London with Elizabeth Hurley: "Okay, you are making the firefighters very upset right now!" (Lloyd Grove's Lowdown)

Those of you racking your brains for a way to piss off George W. Bush and curry favor with Moby and Jack Black at the same time will be pleased to learn about MoveOn.org Voter Fund's new political ad contest. This afternoon, the organization put out the call for 30-second ads that tell "the truth about George Bush" and what Moby terms "his ruinous policies." All entries received between Nov. 24 and Dec. 5 will be posted on MoveOn.org's Bush in 30 Seconds Web site, where they will be voted on by the curious public. Entries with the highest ratings will then be submitted to celebrity judges including contest-spearheader Moby, Jack Black, Michael Moore, Michael Stipe, Gus Van Sant, Tony Shalhoub, James Carville, Donna Brazile, Janeane Garofalo, Margaret Cho and Eddie Vedder, among others. The winning entry will be spruced up for TV and broadcast during the week of Bush's 2004 State of the Union address.

Moby, who contends that the Democrats have neglected their constituency in the "creative community," said during a telephone press conference announcing the contest that the idea for the contest came to him over breakfast one day with the contest's cofounder, singer Laura Dawn: "I said, 'Isn't that a shame that you have all these smart, talented people, all the people who are making records and making movies and writing books and basically every person who's ever bought a Macintosh computer and knows how to use Final Cut Pro, they're all essentially liberal, they're all essentially left-leaning, but yet the Democratic Party isn't prevailing upon them to actually create and help draw attention to President Bush's failed policies.' And in a sort of dilettantish way, I said, 'Wouldn't it be great if there were something we could do that would utilize this great resource, this vast constituency?'"

The mobilized musician says he's hoping to rile the Bill O'Reillys of the world while he's at it. "To be honest with you," he said, "if this didn't piss off the reactionary right-wing media, I'd feel like we were doing something wrong. So I'm hoping they get worked up and hopefully at some point they'll work themselves up into such a tizzy that we'll actually see them for the reactionary half-wits that they happen to be."

Dawn added that the group hopes to add to the contest's roster of celebrity judges, but that, no, the Dixie Chicks have not yet been approached.

Best of the Rest
Page Six: Celebs pack Denise Rich's Angel Ball, which raised $2 million for cancer research: Marc Anthony, Shirley Bassey, Wyclef Jean, Jessica Simpson, Heather Headley, Patti LaBelle, Kristine W and Sarah Dash took the stage, as did Donald Trump and Stevie Wonder; Kate Spade honcho Andy Spade calls Tommy Hilfiger clothing "soulless"; Janeane Garofalo rocks out to Neal Pollack's band in NYC; George Steinbrenner sued for discrimination by former chef; Heidi Klum and Karolina Kurkova compete to see who can throw most elaborate Halloween bash; Rolling Stone guitarist Ron Wood says the band won't stop touring because they "enjoy the music so much"; Yoko Ono gets Peter Jennings to climb into a bag with her and take his shirt off; Ricky Martin rumored to be contemplating marrying his girlfriend, Rebecca de Alba; Debra Winger said to be funny enough for own talk show; "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" producers look for new gay cast members, just in case.

Rush and Molloy: Nelly and Michelle Branch get robbed at Las Vegas' Aladdin Hotel; Madonna said to be mulling suit against Warner Bros. Records; Jessica Simpson's father says his daughter agreed to do MTV's "Newlyweds," where she reveals herself to be quite the daft duck, because "she has nothing to hide ... I believe that Jessica represents all the questions that women across America want to ask their husbands but are afraid to"; Courtney Love posts bail on drug charges; Denis Leary raises more than $500,000 for Firefighter Foundation; Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe welcome second child, a son, Deacon; Katharine Hepburn's estate said to be worth $17.4 million; Heath Ledger and Naomi Watts kiss and make up; Ethan Hawke flirts with nightclub doorwoman while walking his dog.

Boldface Names: Highlights from "Die Mommie Die!" premiere party: Jason Priestley's publicist chases away press; Charles Busch says high tensions at Broadway production of Boy George's "Taboo," produced by Rosie O'Donnell, caused star Raul Esparza to walk out the other day, adds, "It's one of these things where nothing was working"; Natasha Lyonne says love scenes with "Die Mommie Die" costar Priestley were "not as exciting as I guess they ought to be." Plus: David Lynch says his Transcendental Meditation "peace palace" initiative will result in "a marked reduction of crime, especially violent crime, and a reduction in all stress-related illnesses."

--Amy Reiter

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By Karen Croft

Karen Croft is the editor of Salon Sex.

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