Bad heirs, bad hair

How do you instill values? And the horrors of a haircut gone wrong, this week in Table Talk.


Salon Staff
March 31, 2006 3:29PM (UTC)

White House

W's Theocracy II: The Handbasket Stops Here

Nancy Richardson - 08:38 a.m. Pacific Time - Mar 25, 2006 - #9575 of 9659

Rather than deal with the spiritual ... I would like to express concern regarding practical matters which come back to me in concerns about a lesson regarding ... revelations about an epidemic of ethical lapses which are seemingly as common as dirt.

Advertisement:

I would like to smugly say that we Democrats are immune to these problems, that our lapses pale beside the litany of crimes which add up with more and more regularity as the truth seeps out about this administration, and their supporters.

And I have to ask myself if this stuff is only common to Republicans, is it part of their ethos ... a kind of jokey inside hypocrisy which is a con being run on the rubes who preach simplistic morality, while getting rich over having friends in high places.

Or is it a matter of who is in power? And does having all the power concentrated into one party mean that you are going to have Republicans Run Amok?

But I know that isn't just the case. We had a board of education election where the Teacher's Union was supporting a candidate who before the election was revealed to have not disclosed two shoplifting arrests in the '90s. Additionally, he padded his resume by saying he had two master's degrees, when in actuality he had never bothered to complete his theses. He didn't do too well in the primary, and it looks like this guy will have his support withdrawn from the impressive array of endorsers. Ironically, the mayor of our city when he was this candidate's age was also in the process of overcoming some petty trouble he got into when young.

Still, I wonder, as a parent, how one instills in one's kid that stuff you do when young can be symptomatic of serious character problems ... and if anything, besides the joys of a clear conscience, kids have to be told that even when they get away with stuff when they are young, this stuff can come back to haunt them later.

I think that it is as important as drug or sex education ... if not more so, because a lot of us are parents of high achievers ... who someday might feel the call of public service and elective office ... and that what is happening now should be as much a part of the dinner conversation as "don't do drugs ... don't do unprotected sex." Because while we are not as bad as the other guys, many of us are human and not all that virtuous, either.

Advertisement:

And in todays vicious climate of gotcha, if you rise too high ... there will be someone always ready to bring you down. And in the name of self protection ... we have to teach our kids that ethics ain't just a word ... and that we have to hold ourselves to very high standards, even if the other guys are getting away with murder.

Private Life

Bizarre Hatred of Random People, Places, and Things

Blue Bunny - 10:09 a.m. Pacific Time - Mar 29, 2006 - #5038 of 5077

I bizarrely hate bad haircuts. Nothing on earth moves more slowly in time than the process of growing out a bad haircut.

The really frightening part is that many bad haircuts are not evident until about week 2. That's when the tyranny of bad hair days moves in. For the first two weeks, the haricut, most likely a new style, behaves. It's novel, it's sassy. You look just Mahvelouss, dahling!

Advertisement:

Then, well, the hair house of cards begins to slip. All of a sudden, one side appears inches longer than the other, and you reach for the scissors. Snip. Now today, it looks even. Tomorrow, it will look like you trimmed your bangs/sides/top with a linoleum knife.

Ok, plan b. It looks uneven. We can try the tousled Meg Ryan/Lisa Rinna look. Only, you need 'product' for that. None around, but DH has some Dep Sport Styling gel. That'll hold, for today. (And for tomorrow. Heck, that stuff will hold tiles on the space shuttle.) You make a note to stop by Sally's Beauty Supply to pick up some.

This works until about lunch, when you look in the mirror and you appear to have a dark, prickly, wet feather duster on your head. Meg Ryan-Lisa Rinna look is not working. Male boss walks by your cube and asks, hey, is everything OK? Man is smart enough to know that comment on the hair is ground for justifiable homicide at this point.

Advertisement:

Well, no, not OK, but bad hair isn't covered for sick time, so you cope.

Next day, you decide, well, let's try hot rollers. Oh, and because you are busy, you still don't have 'product', so again you settle for the Dep Sport Styling Gel. Today you have the plastic sausage curl look going, but, alas, there are gale force winds in the forecast. After walking from the parking garage to the office, you look like you are wearing a 1970s Barbara Streisand natural.

Everyone comments on the new look, telling you how daring you are to try something so radical. You know they are just being polite. Oh, when will it end?

Advertisement:

Finally, after several days, and hot rollers, curling irons, and new round brushes, you decide that the best solution to this hair fiasco grow-out is to simply put it up in a clip.


Salon Staff

MORE FROM Salon Staff

BROWSE SALON.COM
COMPLETELY AD FREE,
FOR THE NEXT HOUR

Read Now, Pay Later - no upfront
registration for 1-Hour Access

Click Here
7-Day Access and Monthly
Subscriptions also available
No tracking or personal data collection
beyond name and email address

•••


Fearless journalism
in your inbox every day

Sign up for our free newsletter

• • •