Good ol' Rock -- nothin' beats that

The USARPS Web site lets you try to conquer W., Arnold and Hillary in a game of Barack Paper Scissors.

Published September 18, 2008 11:00AM (EDT)

The USARPS -- that is, USA Rock Paper Scissors -- League is offering you the chance to role-play the Democratic presidential nominee in a game of Barack Paper Scissors.

The game moves too slowly to become an all-day workplace addiction, but there are some pretty clever little jokes hidden in Obama's Ro Sham Bo matches with the likes of President Bush, Hillary Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. The Bush joke was stolen from Bart Simpson.

Fox Sports Net will carry the USARPS League championship on Oct. 6. I'd recommend the baseball playoffs that day, but the USARPS Web site is a pretty fun place whether you mix it up on Barack's behalf or not. This video history of Rock Paper Scissors calls it the world's oldest sport, explaining that 6 million years ago, it was called Rock Rock Rock.

What can I say. I'm a sucker for caveman jokes. But I also like the idea that a few thousand years ago it was called Rock Papyrus Knife.

By King Kaufman

King Kaufman is a senior writer for Salon. You can e-mail him at king at salon dot com. Facebook / Twitter / Tumblr

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