How Lou Dobbs ruined the NBA

Border fence keeping Mexicans out of pro basketball?

Published November 2, 2009 9:40PM (EST)

As a general rule, if you don't work for the Onion, it's best to stay away from parodies. Sports parodies, especially, can be treacherous. But as a colleague who sent me a link to one story from observed, the site's article about Lou Dobbs, the border fence and the NBA is actually pretty funny.

From the story:

The news that the NBA’s percentage of Mexican-born players plunged from 2% in 2008 to 1% in 2009, was hailed by CNN television personality Lou Dobbs as proof of the efficacy of tall border fences.

“Mexicans can’t jump,” said Dobbs, a longtime anti-immigration activist, who attributed the new, higher fences along the Mexican border for the reduction of Mexican players in the NBA.

I'll leave a few jokes to the parody itself -- just know that President Obama makes an appearance, too, and it's pretty great. But I did have to share my favorite part of the story, which I like because, based on my experience, it rings very true:

An emotional CNN spokesman, when Dobbs' statement was read to him by a reporter, said, "Oh no, not again," before abruptly ending the telephone interview. CNN is currently last in cable network news ratings.

By Alex Koppelman

Alex Koppelman is a staff writer for Salon.

MORE FROM Alex Koppelman

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Basketball Cnn Lou Dobbs War Room