"Arrrrr!" and other great race horse names

Because we're all sick of Charlie Sheen, we look at genius moments in equestrian novelty

By Drew Grant
Published March 7, 2011 2:25PM (EST)
Insert your favorite pirate joke here!
Insert your favorite pirate joke here!

Because you guys deserve a break from Charlie Sheen and his Warlock web show (or whatever the hell is going on right now), how about a racehorse with an unusual name? We'll give you a hint: It's the favorite letter of Long John Silver and co. We found this awesomeness via Mashable.com, who are also suffering from a Sheen fatigue.

Amazing how much fun announcer/race-botcher Tom Durkin has with this one. Then again, if you've been around the track as many times as he has, it would get pretty hard to phase you with just an odd name. Most thoroughbred breeders have spent their best Derby days on LSD, apparently: "Startastic" and "Commenter" the horsies, anyone?

Sometimes these horses are named specifically to spite the announcers, or so it would seem. So weird, because I was planning to name my first kid "Ya-ka-hick-a-mick-a-dola!"

And do you think these two guys who named their horses after their wives' capacity for knowing stuff planned to race together, or was it just a coincidence?

At this point, should horse-racing just be a horse-naming contest? Of course, I'm still naming my mare "Ladyfingers," as I intend to keep the promise I made to my 10-year-old self.

Drew Grant

Drew Grant is a staff writer for Salon. Follow her on Twitter at @videodrew.

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