Sarah Palin (AP/Carolyn Kaster)

Palin mocks Obama for smoking pot in high school

“You can’t make a phone call without Michelle Obama knowing this is the third time this week you dialed Pizza Hut"

Josh Eidelson
March 9, 2014 5:13AM (UTC)

Brandishing a copy of “Green Eggs and Ham,” and punctuated by cries of “Run, Sarah, Run,” and nine standing ovations, Sarah Palin closed the 2014 CPAC confab with a half-hour speech slamming the president, the media, and GOP leaders in Congress.

Palin told young people that they were “known by the folks across the river” as “Obamacare suckas.” She told women that Democrats “define you still by body parts.” And she told “panties-in-a-wad people” who had spurred A&E to suspend Phil Robertson “for expressing his devout Christian views on the television show about his devout Christian family,” that they should instead “buck up or stay in the truck.” She worked in references in the IRS, Benghazi, “leading from behind,” Jimmy Carter (“the peanut farmer”), and MSNBC (“MSLSD”).


The ex-governor’s shots at Obama included a reference to the president’s high school drug use, telling the crowd, “you’re not just sitting back just hanging, hanging with the choom gang - I hope you’re not.” She also worked in the First Lady, saying that “Yes we can” had turned into “no, you can’t make a phone call without Michelle Obama knowing this is the third time this week you dialed Pizza Hut delivery.”

On foreign policy, Palin charged that rather than “putting the fear of god in our enemies,” the president was employing “dazed and confused strategery,” and “he’s got Al-Qaeda on the run – yeah, perhaps towards us.” Palin asked, “How do you convey to Putin the threat that sounds like, ‘Vladimir, don’t mess or around, or you’re gonna feel my flexibility. ‘Cause I got a phone, and I got a pen, and I can dial real fast and poke you with my pen.’” Speaking in a higher voice, she added, “Promise.”

The reality TV star charged that GOP leaders in Congress, when they should have used the “power of the purse” to stop Obamacare, had instead “retreated” and “joined the lapdogs in the lamestream to trash the foot soldiers who had fought for America.” In contrast, Palin said that Senator Ted Cruz’s filibuster had “worked in waking them up to the folly of a government takeover of another one-sixth of our economy.”


After a 2012 election in which “our fellow Americans had decided evidently to double down on hopey-changey,” Palin reassured the crowd, America had since “became a wiser republic.”

Palin was introduced by NRA Executive Director Chris Cox, who said, “I think one thing we love about Sarah is she drives liberals absolutely crazy…they come unglued.” The reason, he said, is because “she stands firmly in between our freedom and our opponents, who want to drive this country into a place we can’t even recognize.”

Josh Eidelson

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Conservatism Cpac Cpac 2014 Gop Nra Republicans Sarah Palin

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