Joni Ernst is an Iowa state senator. She's a Republican. She would like to be elected U.S. senator. So in her latest television ad, Ernst decided to lead with her biggest strength as a candidate — her significant experience practicing the art of cutting pigs' testicles off.
"I'm Joni Ernst; I grew up castrating hogs on an Iowa farm," begins Ernst's new ad, appropriately named "Squeal."
"So when I get to Washington," she continues, "I'll know how to cut pork."
The ad then runs through the usual clichés of the conservative Republican genre, emphasizing Ernst's fertility (she's described as a mother, soldier and conservative, in that order) and the lessons she learned from her parents about how we must "live within our means" and
cut off all the pigs' testicles repeal Obamacare. After dropping the castration bombshell at the beginning, in other words, "Squeal" plays it safe.
Still, Ernst doesn't leave the viewer without reminding them one more time how good she is at robbing innocent hogs of their hoghood. "Washington's full of big spenders," Ernst grins. "Let's make 'em squeal!"
You can watch "Squeal" below: