Now that the media has run out of half-baked theories as to why Malaysian Airlines Flight MH370 disappeared, it's on to the next one: Everyone is guessing why Solange Knowles attacked her brother-in-law, Jay Z, inside an elevator at the Standard Hotel.
Then "Daily Show" Senior Beyoncé Correspondent Jessica Williams peddled another theory: Beyoncé staged the scene for a promotional stunt, not for a new album, but for a PSA to raise awareness against "private elevator violence" among celebrities.
Let Debbie Harry explain: "It's a terrible epidemic that affects everyone from the very famous, to the incredibly famous. And if private elevator violence isn't stopped, the day might soon come when celebrities have to take the stairs."
"So next time you're riding an elevator with the world's biggest pop stars," Harry continues, "please: think before you kick."
Oh, also, #F*@kYouRush!