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"Yeah, you should ask": Four-year-old deftly explains affirmative consent, the limits of human knowledge

"If they don't want you to kiss them, then they say no. And if they do, they say yes"

By Katie McDonough

Published April 14, 2015 8:22PM (EDT)

      (<a href='http://www.istockphoto.com/profile/richvintage'>RichVintage</a> via <a href='http://www.istockphoto.com/'>iStock</a>)
(RichVintage via iStock)
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A four-year-old named Theo takes on affirmative consent and the limits of four-year-old knowledge, via Ravishly:

Dear Theo,

Do you think it's best to ask before kissing someone for the first time, or should you try it and see where it goes? People say it's not romantic to ask permission but I want people to feel like I respect their space. -- Grace from Rockridge

Yeah, you should ask. Because if they don't want you to kiss them, then they say no. And if they do, they say yes. One day when I was going home, one friend tried to hold my hand and I felt sad.

I don't know about romance, because I'm a four year old. Four year olds don't know about romance.

h/t Jessica Valenti


By Katie McDonough

Katie McDonough is Salon's politics writer, focusing on gender, sexuality and reproductive justice. Follow her on Twitter @kmcdonovgh or email her at kmcdonough@salon.com.

MORE FROM Katie McDonough


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