John Waters reveals on "Real Time" the one shot of Trump he hopes to see post-sentencing

Speaking to Bill Maher, Waters says that while most prisoners smuggle in cell phones, Trump will have other needs

By Kelly McClure

Nights & Weekends Editor

Published June 1, 2024 2:55PM (EDT)

Filmmaker John Waters attends the 74th Annual ACE Eddie Awards at Royce Hall on March 03, 2024 in Los Angeles, California. (Amanda Edwards/Getty Images)
Filmmaker John Waters attends the 74th Annual ACE Eddie Awards at Royce Hall on March 03, 2024 in Los Angeles, California. (Amanda Edwards/Getty Images)

Director John Waters made an appearance on "Real Time with Bill Maher" at the start of the weekend and, naturally, he was asked to weigh-in on Trump in his felon era, which he seemed happy to do.

Recovered from a car accident that took place in Baltimore County in May, landing him in the hospital with bumps, bruises, but no major injuries, Waters was primarily there to promote the 4K UHD and Blu-ray release of his 1990 film "Cry-Baby," starring Johnny Depp, but pulled from his experience as a "trial groupie" to put his own unique spin on the former president's upcoming sentencing on July 11.

Having spent a lot of time in a courtroom, in support of his friend Leslie Van Houten — one-time Manson associate, who was paroled in 2023 after spending 53 years in prison — he doesn’t go to trials anymore, for fear of being recognized. He says he did watch Trump’s trial from home, however, and remarked that if he ends up getting house arrest at sentencing, Melania will scream so loudly that it will likely be heard all the way from Trump Tower to the White House.

When asked if he thinks Trump will go to prison, Waters says that he’s only interested in seeing one shot: Trump being loused down in the showers with “that one piece of hair hanging down there.” He jokes that in jail, prisoners usually pay guards to sneak in cell phones, but Trump will likely pay to have Just For Men brought in for him, in a shade that Waters suspects to be Honey Blond. Elsewhere in the chat, he comments that in all the details brought up in trial, they failed to mention Stormy Daniels' description of Trump’s appendage, which she’s previously described as looking like a tiny mushroom.

Maher, visibly uncomfortable discussing male genitalia, gayness and speaking to someone who is actually funny, brought up Waters casting Traci Lords in “Crybaby,” comparing her to porn star Daniels. 

“Well, the difference was, nothing happens good when you’re a porn star at underage. Those movies are all kiddie porn and she’s over that. She has a whole other life,” Waters says of Lords. “Stormy Daniels actually took credit. She produces her own movies.”

Dipping into the topic of Pride Month, Waters comments on the Pope’s stance on homosexuality, saying that what he should really be concerned about is child molesters.

“Beyond the gay thing, because it’s so accepted now, I want new minorities,” Waters says. “I want strags, straight guys who only sleep with fag hags. There’s also trag kings. That's trans who go further and get in drag as what they were before. I’m trying to come up with new perversions.”

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