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Metro Times Detroit

“Apocalypse, please” by Metro Times staff

This list of 1,000 reasons the Metro Times staff is glad the last millennium is over is actually just a shortsighted itemization of tripe from the last 50 years in pop culture. A sample: Heaven’s Gate cult, Blue Oyster Cult, Ishtar, Jar Jar Binks, Virginia Slims ads … Like who isn’t pissed about “The Mummy”?

But the title — “Apocalypse, please” — sets the tone. It invokes many a person’s secret wish that the world would fall apart, forcing everyone to start life over from scratch at the age of 26, 38, 62 or whatever. It isn’t enough that we have to listen to the Blue Oyster Cult. Humanity must be punished for spawning such garbage.

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Feed, Jan. 4, 2000

Daily Feed by Steven Johnson

Steven Johnson is relieved that the turning of the calendar was not accompanied by “global technological meltdown, Ebola in the subways, or the Coming Of The Dark Prince.” At the same time, he is saddened by the lack of what he calls “visceral carnage.” He writes: “With six billion souls strapped onto Spaceship Earth, and not one of them capable of implementing a fiendish millennial scheme, you can’t help wondering if — at least in the Evil Genius category — we’re becoming a species of underachievers.” And I agree! Was nobody brave or smart enough to pull some large-scale prank that would have sent thousands into a temporary tizzy? But there’s really not much more to say about that, so Johnson spends his remaining paragraphs talking about Peter Jennings’ inane coverage of the festivities.

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New York Press, Jan. 6-12

“Preaching to the stupid” by John Strausbaugh

John Strausbagh is depressed not only because the event itself was a letdown, but because magazines’ “Millennial Issues” failed to enthrall. To this I say, Doy huh. Did anybody actually expect that Rolling Stone and the Nation would have something unique to say about the turning of a year?

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Wilammette Week, Jan. 5-11

“Bye, 2K” by Philip Dawdy

It was boring, says this cub reporter about the New Year’s Eve festivities in Portland, Ore. It was not nearly as exciting as I thought it would be.

Thanks for that fascinating report, Philip Dawdy. Now back to you, Peter Jennings.

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Orlando Weekly

“Y2K complacent?” by Steve Perry

Don’t throw out that bunker! It’s not over yet! For reasons beyond the human scope of comprehension, the Orlando Weekly is highlighting this Sept. 16, 1999, news story on its Web site. In it, intrepid reporter Steve Perry complains that the media is really underplaying the impending threat of the havoc-wreaking Y2K bug.

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Minneapolis/St. Paul City Pages, Jan. 5-11

“Year of the White Male” by Keith Harris

“Above all, 1999 was a great year to be a white man, as much in music as anything else,” declares Keith Harris in this end-of-the-year-in-music wrap-up. He then goes on to yammer about Limp Bizkit for paragraph after bloody paragraph. Perhaps we should also declare 1999 a great year to be a music writer without an editor.

The Village Voice, Jan. 5-11

“The Dis-Integration of Baseball” by Eliot Asinof

In this strange yet charming piece, the author talks about how baseball is no longer a national pastime and bemoans the corporatization of the sport as somehow un-American. Then he basically turns the mike over to a guy he met at a bar who argued that we should re-segregate the sport. “‘I played in the Negro Leagues in the old days,’ he said. ‘Traveled all over, had to eat racist shit everywhere but on the ball fields. There was great teams. Lots of great ballplayers … Then Jackie broke the color line … And pretty soon there ain’t no more Negro Leagues. TV and white clubs owned it all. Maybe it was good for the blacks in the big show, but it do no good for the 50 million in the ghettos. Blacks stopped playing the game, and then they stopped going to spectate, too.’”

Why this article works, I don’t know. It’s dreadfully unfocused and apropos of nothing. Yet it’s refreshing to see a writer who thought he had his subject nailed shrug his shoulders and say, Hell, I don’t know. Maybe this guy does. Do you?

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Long Island Village Voice, Jan. 5-11

“A Couple of Startling Facts” by Beth Greenfield

Beth Greenfield uses a current study being conducted on gay parents to talk about the sordid history of such studies. Anti-gay interests publish research that supports the claim that gay parents are bad parents, while gay proponents (including the lesbian researchers Greenfield profiles here) find evidence to defend their desire to raise families. Even this reporter has an agenda. Greenfield, who’s gay, interposes reflections on her own desires to have children and positive anecdotes from gay families with her reporting.

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New Times L.A., Jan. 6-12

“Battling babe-hounds” by Tony Ortega

With endearing self-awareness, reporter Tony Ortega chronicles an ongoing battle between R. Don Steele, the author of “How to Date Young Women” and “How to Dump Your Wife,” and Ross Jeffries, inventor of Speed Seduction, a method of getting women into bed using double entendres. Ortega follows the foibles of these ridiculous he-men wannabes from their Internet flame wars to an ongoing court battle. It’s a wonderful example of truth that’s stranger than fiction, and Ortega does an excellent job of capturing all the situation’s wacky nuances.

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McSweeney’s

“Accurate or Nearly Accurate Utterances …” by Gregory Galloway

Quiz time! One of the best features of my local alternative weekly, the East Bay Express, is something called “Overheard.” A reporter lists a movie, its showtime, location and two or three quotes from members of the audience. Gregory Galloway brightly turns this fun little riff into a matching quiz.

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New Times Broward/Palm Beach, Jan. 6-12

“Miracle Baby” by Julie Kay

This reporter has just discovered that sperm — get this — can be frozen, thawed, shot up a woman and wind up puking all over your good suit nine months later. Who knew?

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Postscript …

Last month, I pointed to a City Pages article about a guy who, when he quit his corporate job, sent out a manifesto to his co-workers that rocked some people’s worlds. Several readers wrote in asking to see the manifesto. The author himself has now contacted me with a link for your personal enjoyment and edification.

In October, I dismissed the marketing-driven rag Wine X as so much bottom-of-the-barrel swill. “Is there a smart, well-written, bullshit-free wine zine out there for wine-drinkers of modest means, but discerning tastes?” I asked. Robin Garr wrote to assure me there was — his! Blatant self-promotion aside, Garr’s Wine Lover’s Page does seem to fit the bill. It’s a straightforward, unpretentious read on the almighty vine — with reviews, forums and other delightful features.

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Seattle Weekly, Dec. 16-22

“Option envy” by Soyon Im

This is not a typical “Everyone’s getting rich off the new economy but me” essay; instead, Soyon Im bluntly discusses her desire and inability to keep up with a city being transformed by new wealth. The gap in spending power between her and her newly enriched friends has been insurmountable. It led to the breakup of one relationship and much soul-searching about her decision to be a poor but proud writer. Her desire to get rich too isn’t greed, per se, but fear of being left out of her social circle.

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Long Island Village Voice

“A Trip Down The Scary AMAZON.COM” by Mark Fefer

It’s easy to forget this, as you’re hurriedly surfing the Internet for that perfect present to give to Auntie May, but somebody actually had to write those 25-word e-commerce descriptions. Mark Fefer talks to three of the freelance “content providers” who have been hastily reviewing toys for Amazon.com. One writer tells Fefer: “I’d be looking at one of these no-purpose gelatinous balls with hunks of plastic floating around in it, made in some sweatshop in Singapore, and think, ‘What am I supposed to say about this?’ … Sometimes my approach was, ‘Let’s see what it would take to break this.’”

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Metro Times Detroit

“Rethinking ink” by Curtrise Garner

Here’s some big, exciting news for all those fools with Loony Toons cartoon characters inked into their skin: Thanks to laser surgery, tattoos are no longer permanent. This is technological innovation at its finest. It takes a common problem (“This tattoo is no longer cool”) and provides help where there once was only misery. Oddly enough, the writer of this piece naively asserts that the only people who have and would like to get rid of tattoos are Gen Xers who fell prey to “a major fashion trend of the ’90s.”

Minneapolis/St. Paul City Pages, Dec. 15-21

“Rage Within the Machine” by Mike Mosedale

Don’t shoot your boss, just spam his or her fat, overpaid ass! An employee at American Express Financial Advisors’ Mutual Fund and Certificate Transaction Line recently announced his resignation by emailing a 3,500-word “manifesto” to more than 800 of his co-workers. The memo raged against the company’s policies and the tyranny of cubicles among other things. Reporter Mike Mosedale insightfully notes: “The episode highlights an intriguing departure from the old-school method of showing one’s disgruntlement on the way out the door — flipping the bird, hollering at the top of one’s lungs, or, in extreme cases, ‘going postal.’ It also provides a sharp counterpoint to employers’ increased use of technology to track workers’ productivity and behavior. According to a 1999 survey by the American Management Association, 45 percent of major U.S. corporations engage in electronic monitoring of employees … But the very same technology that would seem to give Big Brother the upper hand allows the peeved proletarian to disseminate his own message.”

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S.F. Weekly, Dec. 15-21

“Online Pirates of the Caribbean” by Jack Boulware

When old laws and new media collide, injustice inevitably occurs. Due to a 1961 law that prohibits placing bets over phone lines, gambling over the Internet is currently considered illegal in the U.S. Jack Boulware gives a fascinating glimpse into how this has affected the lives of three former San Francisco options traders. They thought they were operating aboveboard when they moved to Antigua to operate an online gambling site. Now they’re considered fugitives.

“Mushroom crowd” by Silke Tudor

I have long been baffled by the passion of mushroomers. What on earth possesses people to get so worked up over “discovering” fungus? Then, as I was hiking through a redwood forest this weekend, it hit me: Mushrooming is adventure sporting for the elite! It requires education, ample leisure time and sophisticated culinary taste. And, once every year or so, you hear of some rich bloke eating the wrong mushroom and keeling over at the dinner table. Mushrooming is less strenuous than climbing Everest, but equally stupid and pretentious. Alas, none of these observations are in Silke Tudor’s piece on mushrooming, which provides plenty of kinder insights into the world of mycology fanatics.

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Boston Phoenix, Dec. 16-22

“Borderline behavior” by Al Giordano

Smart and thorough political reporting from the Boston Phoenix. Al Giordano looks at current U.S. Ambassador to Mexico Jeffrey Davidow’s involvement in Pinochet’s Chilean military regime and explores current accusations that Ambassador Davidow is bending the rules in Mexico as well.

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L.A. Weekly, Dec. 17-23

“Why Did He Cut That Man’s Leg Off?” by Paul Ciotti

Here’s journalistic voyeurism at its best. This story serves no better purpose than to entertain you with sick examples of depraved humanity, and it does so very, very well. Paul Ciotti takes us into the world of John Ronald Brown, a former unlicensed sex-change surgeon now serving time for murder. His victim? A 79-year-old man who, as one of Ciotti’s sources puts it, “just wanted his leg cut off so he could get a hard-on.” Brown serviced the senior’s fetish, but the wound developed gangrene and the amputated man died. Murder, amputation fetishes, tales of botched sex-change surgeries with unimaginable results, blood-spurting penises … Does it get any better, or worse (depending on your perspective), than this?

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Note to readers: Alt will be on vacation until the new millennium.

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L.A. Weekly, Dec. 10-16

“The Dutiful Daughter” by Jim Crogan

“Not just a nameless, faceless statistic on the city’s traffic-accident rolls, Maria Luisa Forester, the 66th pedestrian killed on Los Angeles streets this year, was someone’s daughter, mother and wife. On December 16, she would have turned 59.” The author, Jim Crogan, is practically a witness to her death. She is struck by a vehicle, which doesn’t stick around, just outside his house. In vivid, anguished language he relives those confused moments as he discovers her body, calls for help. He speaks with her relatives to find out who she was. Once he has painted a full picture, he shares how easily her death may have been avoided: a few additional street lights.

Crogan achieves the perfect balance between overdramatization and cold summation, which in turns allows his subject to be a poster child for a cause without sacrificing her uniqueness. Explaining this accomplishment, he writes: “As a reporter, I’ve seen plenty of human tragedy, covering cops, courts, gangs and corruption. I’ve also covered the L.A. riots and the war in El Salvador. But when I’m working, there’s a switch inside me that automatically clicks off the emotions. It gives me some small distance from the trauma and sadness that I regularly encounter … This was different. I was home.”

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Miami New Times, Dec. 9-15

“Her so-called life” by Lissette Corsa

Porsche Williams’ life and death were indeed tragic, but there are too many lessons here to fit onto one poster: poverty, a mother who died of AIDS, pregnancy in middle school, a social network that failed to intervene and, finally, an abusive boyfriend who murdered her when she tried to leave him. Lissette Corsa clearly wants to blame someone for Porsche’s death, but there is no clear culprit. Without a villain, the story loses its impact. This, of course, does not mean that Porsche’s story doesn’t deserved to be told — though without cliched flourishes such as this one would be nice: “‘Mama, I’m scared,’ Porsche confessed before leaving the 91-year-old matriarch who helped raise her.” The reality is, this victim’s name and face will never be used to rally forces against the confluence of circumstances that resulted in her demise.

The Village Voice, Dec. 8-14

“Homeless for the holidays”

One might be tempted to write off this collection of interviews and photographs as traditional holiday guilting, were not New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani so determined to make us all think of homeless people as subhuman. This is a battle of the poster children. The mayor is using the blond, sweet image of Nicole Barrett to arouse anger against all homeless people, even though she was attacked by just one man who wasn’t necessarily homeless. The Village Voice counters his idiocy by giving names, faces and stories to those most would rather ignore.

What would have bolstered the effectiveness of this feature is the inclusion of children’s photographs and stories. (Jennifer Gonnerman does profile one homeless family.) As Richard Goldstein points out in his essay, “Sanctioned Sadism,” “the average homeless person in New York is a child. On any given night, about 5,000 families, including 9,000 children, make up most of the population in city shelters.” Children, I might also add, look really good on posters.

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L.A. Weekly, Dec. 10-16

“Gamecock Confidential” by David Cogan

The first item of this gossip column perhaps warrants a longer piece. Just as Los Angeles is finally ready to embrace homegrown James Ellroy, the noir author has settled down somewhere else — Kansas City, Mo., to be exact. Furthering the slight, he’s donated his literary papers to the University of South Carolina.

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Minneapolis/St. Paul City Pages, Dec. 8-14

“Hot Enough for You?” by Mike Mosedale

The editorial staff at the Minneapolis/St. Paul City Pages clearly has a penchant for quirky, long — and I do mean long — “ordinary people doing extraordinary things” profiles. It is their forte. (I recommend the printout version.) They’ve published cover stories on mosquito exterminators, parade organizers, dirt-dishing grannies and now this: the local freelance weatherman who, incidentally, predicted global warning long — oh, and I do mean long — before anybody else. When done well, as this one is, they make for entertaining reads for slow, casual days and airplane rides.

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Seattle Weekly, Dec. 9-15

“Ready (w)to wear” by Mark Driver

Because you can never write too many articles about the fun and frolicking time had by all in Seattle last week, Mark Driver finds yet another angle from which to analyze the scene on the streets: fashion. “Seattle is set once again to unleash a national fashion craze. In the past week, cops and protesters alike modeled daring new looks on the world stage, accessorizing with bandannas, kneepads, and helmets, while sending strong hints that the new black is, well, black.”

The agreeable took the easy way out and described the film as — and I sum up — “A rollicking, action packed, apocalyptic hootenanny!” That’s fine if you’re writing to endear yourself to the L.A. film publicists. Commentators who wish to maintain their indie street cred must resort to either seething disdain, stand-up comedy or some amusing combination of the two.

The plot

“A young woman (Robin Tunney of ‘The Craft’ in a woefully underwritten role) is the chosen bride of … (say it like Dana Carvey’s Church Lady) SATAN! If he has her during the hour immediately preceding the millennial midnight, ‘the world as we know it will cease to be.’ So sayeth Rod Steiger …” (The Hartford Advocate)

Ah-nahld

“The days when the popular culture rather generously made a home for this hydrant-headed dummkopf are coming to an end. Indeed, ‘End of Days’ is Arnold’s idea of stretching, playing a vodka-chugging security guard whose alcoholism hasn’t interfered with his round-the-clock (and unreferenced, but c’mon) weight training …” (The Village Voice)

“In his endearingly heavy-handed way, Arnold saves the world, again and again, from predators and interlopers, leaving behind more corpses than a cholera epidemic.” (Metro Times, Detroit)

Director Peter Hyams

“Director Peter Hyams doesn’t get enough credit as a satirist (the Jean Claude Van Damme vehicle ‘Sudden Death’ is utterly hilarious, though too many people took it ‘seriously’), but here he does it again. The smart aleck villain, the tortured hero, the wacky sidekick (Kevin Pollak), the sexy girl literally overcoming her demons, Rod Steiger as a crazy priest, the pope in a wheelchair, a dead guy on the ceiling — ‘End of Days’ has it all.” (The Stranger (Seattle))

Satan

“Satan, as everyone knows, lives in New York and is a really good kisser. He’s so good at it that he can just start kissing anyone he wants and they immediately get into it. Satan is kinda like David Hasselhof’s idea of himself.” (Tucson Weekly)

Mind-boggling leaps in reason

“Nobody in the film seems to have any awareness that the name Thomas Aquinas already has some currency in religious circles, so when Schwarzenegger asks people ‘Do you know Thomas Aquinas?’ they never start quoting the ‘Summa Contra Gentiles’; instead they always just say ‘You mean that crazy priest?’” (Tuscon Weekly)

“Let’s stop right here and dwell for a moment on the concept of a Mephistopheles who only rises to the surface every 1,000 years (as the script tells us), yet can’t find a better vessel than Gabriel Byrne.” (Orlando Weekly)

Philosophy

“A cosmos whose driving force of malevolence can be outwitted by Arnold Schwarzenegger is a safer haven than we ever suspected.” (Minneapolis/St. Paul City Pages)

“Did you know that 666 turned upside down is 999…as in 1999?” (Dallas Observer)

How it ends

“Yep, it’s the end of something all right.” (In Pittsburgh Weekly)

How to feel about it

“The world needs another tale of millennial apocalypse brought on by Satan like we need paper cuts in the ocean.” (Anchorage Press)

“Just think of it as a really rousing remake of ‘The Muppets Take Manhattan’ and I think your low expectations will pay off in sheer cinematic fun.” (Tucson Weekly)

“By the finale, you won’t care whether Arnold saves the world or not, because burning in hell might be a better option than seeing another film by Schwarzenegger or Hyams.” (Willamette Week)

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Seattle Weekly, Dec. 2-8

“A mania for tights (Or, How to make The Nutcracker live up to its name.)” by Frankie Ghee

“The Nutcracker” presents critics with a terrible conundrum. Dis it and face a gaping hole where once ballet ads were. Praise it, and never be taken seriously again. Seattle Weekly columnist Frankie Ghee takes a new approach, suggesting a WWF-”Nutcracker” crossover event. It would at once enrich ballet’s coffers and lend some much-needed sophistication to pro wrestling. Now that’s what I call fun for the whole family.

Green

“Do You Believe in Life After Love?” by Eric Gillin

Eric Gillin, a writer at TheStreet.com, has dreams — namely of writing punchy prose about beer, breasts and gadgets for Maxim. His personal account of his application process at that magazine to fulfill those dreams is a wonderful read, and between the one-liners and drunken bouts there’s some interesting insight into the overrated world of New York publishing. In this, the last of his four-part saga, ambitious youngster Gillin learns his fate.

Green, by the way, started several years back as a zine that addressed financial issues in terms those of us without M.B.A.s could comprehend. Under the leadership of its founding editor Ken Kurson, it is improving steadily without sacrificing any of its unique character.

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Weekly Planet (Tampa Bay, Fla.), Nov. 25-Dec. 1

“An Instant Family” by John Sugg

For those of you who embrace the feel-good, family, love, “most wonderful time of the year” theory of the holidays, John Sugg writes this eloquent essay on adoption. Sugg and his wife recently adopted five children at once — this after decades of coupledom. Heartwarming or stupid? You decide.

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The Village Voice, Dec. 1-7

“AIDS: The Agony of Africa” by Mark Schoofs

Mark Schoofs continues his six-part series on the AIDS epidemic in Africa with a look at how the submissive sexual role many women on the continent are forced to take has led to the increased spread of the sexually transmitted virus. The Voice deserves high praise for publishing this challenging and important series, all of which is worth reading.

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Missoula Independent, Nov. 25-Dec. 1

“Gearing Up for Winter” by Jeff Seaton

New sick trend alert! Snow biking — that is, riding a bike down ski slopes — is the NEW BIG THING. Quick! Someone call MTV! Get Daisy Fuentes on this immediately!

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The riots in Seattle have stolen headlines for the past week, and I don’t wish to add much to the glut of information already at your disposal concerning the World Trade Organization and its excitable critics. However, if you are searching for the alt. weekly perspective on all things tear gas, the Seattle Weekly has published more articles than you could ever hope for on the topic. For slightly less rousing commentary, the Willamette Week published a lengthy round-table discussion of the conference in its venerable pages.

Imagine, if you will, the staff of your local alternative news source as a dysfunctional family. In the basement you have the rebellious teenagers, bucking tradition, subverting social norms and crashing the family car; we call them “editorial.” In the master suite you have the parents who earn the dough that feeds the brats and enables them to pursue their snotty dreams of journalistic glory — call them “sales.” For the most part, these two factions coexist in a peaceful, though tense, state. Once a year, however, the parents demand that the kids dress themselves up, grab a tin cup and make with the caroling.

The result: The dread holiday gift guide.

Hard-nosed city beat reporters waxing eloquent on the virtues of bed and breakfasts. Pessimistic rock critics raving about the new Frank Sinatra re-release. (“It comes with a bottle of red wine and a Santa hat!”) Jaded columnists praising the local sex shops’ latest batch of specialty lubes.

Of course, not all alternative weeklies buckle entirely when the holidays approach (as opposed to your local newspaper, which is at this very moment making kissy faces on Santa Cash’s fat, sweaty lap). After all, you can’t just go from ranting against all things capitalist to touting the glories of Anna Sui’s new Eau de Toilette without some kind of struggle. Can you?

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Socialist shopper: Consuming for the good of all mankind

The San Francisco Bay Guardian takes the high road with its consciousness-raising gift guide. Gifts for the spiritually inclined! Make your own, at this “make your own gift” store! Give the intangible: a gift certificate, perhaps? Surprisingly, the Guardian fails to suggest giving to charity or volunteering. But I forgot, good causes don’t advertise.

Ohhhh, irony!

“Obey Santa,” demands the Baltimore City Paper in a display of so very hip self-awareness. “You will enjoy our HOLIDAY GUIDE of yuletide ideas, happenings, and way-cool gifts.” The introduction to this quirky little gift guide (they recommend buying faux East German guard hats) is a veritable parade of conflicted ramblings. Christmas sucks, but it’s really great. We hate to tell you to buy stuff, but we’re now going to tell you to buy stuff.

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Gift guide? Where do we sell ou– I mean, sign up?

This technology-focused gift guide is just the first in a line of upcoming gift guides slated to run in the Seattle Weekly. There is no pretense of self-awareness or do-gooderism here. The first gift I read about was a $499 Bose stereo system, followed by a $199 electric self-cleaning litter box. There’s even a page listing holiday mall hours. Apparently, Microsoft, Amazon and Boeing are treating the city’s urban hipster demographic very well this year. The guide-lovin’ Weekly tops off its gift list with “Winter Fun!” This bundle of content tells you, the reader, where to ski, gamble, fly the friendly skies! Buy! Buy! Buy, dammit! Buy!

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Detroit Metro Times

“The real personal trainer” by Liz Langley

While not a gift guide per se, Liz Langley’s article on new products devoted to strengthening those invisible, yet powerful pubococcygeus muscles hits just the right note of humor as she describes wondrous products like the kegelcisor, or FemTone vaginal weights. “These are not weights designed to keep your vagina from drifting out to sea or floating off in a high wind. They are little elliptical objects of graduated weight (0.7 to 2.5 ounces) with thin cords attached so they look like tampons or surreally large nightmare sperm.” If all product guides read like this, I might find it in my heart to be jolly this Christmas. If Cosmo girls, with their obsession with all things vaginal, wrote like this, I actually might be inspired to pick up that insipid little glossy.

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Missoula Independent, Nov. 11-17

“Soldiers of Misfortune” by Ruth Thorning

On an entirely different topic, this provocative article looks at how budget cuts and an increasing number of retirement-age veterans have created a crisis in the six-decade old federal Veterans Administration. It’s hardly a new story, but Ruth Thorning’s examination is well worth reading. Instead of just raging against the machine, she stops to reflect on the personal, the local and the national costs of our country’s appalling treatment of its veterans.

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Village Voice, Nov. 17-23

“A Real Man” by Norah Vincent

Maybe it’s just me, but I can’t seem to open a magazine, peruse Publisher’s Weekly or read a newspaper without stumbling across yet another published piece written about or by a real, live transsexual. Can someone please tell me what is the point of obsessing over this relatively rare operation? Every account reads the same. He used to be a she, or vice versa. Get it? He or she had therapy, took hormones, got surgery. It was difficult for his or her (pick one) parents/spouse/kids to accept. But, eventually, they did or didn’t. The journey was the destination. Love is more important than gender. Now he or she is happy with his or her life. If only society would accept him or her too. This is not interesting subject matter. It’s miniseries fodder.

Now, if you’ll please excuse me, I have a lot of online shopping to do …