Kate Harding
Her mouth says no, but her lip gloss says yes
Who needs enthusiastic consent when cosmetics can tell you if she's in the mood?
Female lips. A photo close up(Credit: Sergey Galushko) So, here’s the worst idea I’ve heard all week: Lip gloss that lets everyone around you know you’re horny. “The saucy slap changes from clear to deep crimson as the wearer feels frisky,” reports The Sun. “It works by reacting with a girl’s body chemistry. And each £12 tube comes with a colour chart so men can work out how randy their partner is feeling.” Well, that all sounds reassuringly scientific.
Mood lipstick, like its notoriously inaccurate cousin the mood ring, is hardly new; I recall it being all the rage when I was still in elementary school, and I doubt that was the first time. But as far as I know, this is the first iteration that’s been marketed as a translator of female desire for befuddled men who would otherwise have no idea if they stood to get lucky. Which is just a terrific idea, except for a few things. 1) If “reacting with a girl’s body chemistry” means the changes are heat-activated, as they are with mood rings and similar products, a “frisky” reading could mean a whole lot of other things. There’s still a shocking number of grown men out there who haven’t fully grasped that erect nipples aren’t always the result of being turned on — do we really want to give them one more thing to misinterpret? 2) Even if one’s lipgloss accurately reflects arousal, feeling aroused does not necessarily mean one wants to have sex right this minute. 3) Even if one wants to have sex right this minute, one doesn’t necessarily want to have it with whoever happens to be around when her lip gloss goes scarlet.
All of which means that the words coming from a woman’s lips remain the most reliable indicator of her desire or lack thereof. Go figure.
I don’t really worry that “Her lip gloss turned red!” will one day be a successful defense in a rape case — though I wouldn’t put it past some lawyers to try — but I do worry that a marketing strategy like this (tongue-in-cheek though it may be) reinforces the pernicious myth that figuring out whether a woman wants to have sex is some daunting puzzle far beyond the intellectual and emotional capabilities of the average Joe. (It’s actually pretty simple. If you have any doubt, ask. If you think asking will ruin the moment, boo hoo; it’s no excuse for refusing to put on a condom, and it’s no excuse for going forward without clear, enthusiastic consent.) And it’s even more troubling that this strategy is being used on a primarily female market. Sure, I can see it working as a bachelorette gift or a gag between already partnered people (“Did you notice what color my lip gloss is, honey?”), but beyond that, it’s playing on a bunch of creepy retro ideas about femininity. That women who want sex are supposed to be coy about it, that we’re supposed to send plausibly deniable signals instead of admitting what we want, that we must make ourselves approachable but never do the approaching ourselves, lest we be written off as aggressive sluts. All of which, guess what, reinforces the belief that women never give a straight answer about whether they’re in the mood, which means men can’t be expected to figure it out — and women can’t be trusted when they report that they did not consent.
I know, whatever, it’s just lip gloss. But the fact that someone thought women would love a product that says “I want sex” to anyone standing nearby — because using our words is just too hard, apparently — is a serious turn off.
Fashion’s bad boy perv goes too far
Models accuse photographer Terry Richardson of sexual harassment, but the industry still loves him
Photographer Terry Richardson at the Marc Jacobs 2008 spring collection show during New York Fashion Week. Not much is truly made clear by the recent spate of articles about photographer Terry Richardson — either a misunderstood genius or a tampon tea-loving predator, depending on whom you ask — but I’ve come to a couple of firm conclusions after reading several of them. 1) Terry Richardson has a lot of powerful friends. 2) The fact that so many people seem to like him is quite the faith-in-humanity killer.
Continue Reading CloseFemale athletes can’t win for winning
The University of Connecticut's women's basketball team is kicking butt, which somehow means girls can't play?
This season, the University of Connecticut women’s basketball team has won 72 games in a row — breaking its own record, garnering excited new Huskies fans and national media attention. Van Chancellor, a former WNBA coach and current coach of Louisiana State’s women’s team told the New York Times it’s “one of the greatest things ever to happen to women’s basketball.” Frank Deford recently said the team “may well be the most overwhelming power ever to dominate any major sport.” This sounds like a happy story, right?
Continue Reading CloseHey, Gabourey Sidibe: Hate yourself yet?
Diet endorsement deals and career advice keep pouring in for the actress. She's not the one who needs help
Gabourey Sidibe in January. Gabourey Sidibe is obviously unhealthy and needs to lose weight if she wants to have a successful career. There, I said it!
No, I don’t really believe a word of that. But apparently, anyone who says it this week automatically becomes newsworthy, and what the hell, I could use some buzz to help sell my next book. Sorry, Gabs, you know I love you — let’s just keep that between us for the moment, though, OK?
Continue Reading Close“Jihad Jane”: One more argument against profiling
The story of Colleen LaRose reminds us that we can't know what a terrorist looks like
In this June 26, 1997 booking photo released by the Tom Green County Jail in San Angelo, Texas, is shown Colleen R. LaRose. LaRose, the self-described "Jihad Jane" who thought her blond hair and blue eyes would let her blend in as she sought to kill an artist in Sweden, is a rare case of an American woman aiding foreign terrorists and shows the evolution of the global threat, authorities say. LaRose is accused in an indictment filed Tuesday, March 9, 2010, of actively recruiting fighters, as well as agreeing to murder the artist, marry a terrorism suspect so he could move to Europe and martyr herself if necessary. (AP Photo/Tom Green County Jail)(Credit: AP) Anyone who’s paid attention to analysis of racial profiling from sources other than right-wing radio talk show hosts has probably gathered by now that it does not work so well. Kim Zetter and Patrick Smith have written about it for Salon, and Malcolm Gladwell famously compared it to (also misguided) legislation banning particular dog breeds. It unfairly targets innocent people, it’s been shown to produce fewer accurate identifications of criminals than not profiling, it wastes resources and of course, it leaves out every baddie who doesn’t fit the profile.
Continue Reading CloseA boob gag that actually works
Marion Cotillard stars in this spoof ad, which offers a new solution for guys staring at your chest
It takes a lot, in 2010, to come up with a “My eyes are up here, dude” joke that actually feels fresh. But this spoof ad for “Forehead Tittaes,” starring Academy Award winner Marion Cotillard, actually pulls it off. The “scientific” claims are spot on (“Lab tests prove that Forehead Tittaes actually redirect the male gaze from the chest to the general area of the brain”), William Fichtner’s silent turn as a lecherous boss is delightful, and Lesley Ann Warren’s total commitment to the gag she got stuck with is a sight to behold. Enjoy.
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